Monday, 28 March 2011

TRIANGLE - A mythsterious holographic mirage-collage


Here then is another slice of enigmatic poetrie masquerading as a sortastory. You have been warned.

TRIANGLE

In the dream, the truck is careening through air.
Your friend in the backseat screams silence in slow motion. The steering-wheel locks. Beneath is the chasm.
Time crawls. Perhaps it has not yet started.
In the pit of desire, Khufu is laughing at you. If your heart is heavier than a feather, you will not pass go, and not collect one hundred coins to place beneath anyone’s tongue.
In the burial chamber, the mummified sleep secure in their striated levels of occultation. These mechanics oscillating, the harmonic vibrations build a tone that operates at the highest levels. Do not pass go.
They have asked what lies behind the final door of the pyramid. Perhaps the dread visage of the ibis. Perhaps the braying of the oxen.
The spiral of galaxies. Every servant to have served you.
Yes and no lost in the helix. The misunderstanding of aeons. Bloodletting and wine.
Only one question is allowed. The final door leads to nothing, and God knows where.
Ancient knowledge was here once. Then Lucifer came and swept aside the stars.
The ink still drying on the papyrus. Some things like this must have taken more than a hundred years.
Billions of understandings stacked up like societies. Lying in the grave with every neuron firing.
Pictures and light. The cavern wall bends. Ezekiel’s wheels turn and break the clouds.
The warriors descend. Someone opened the bible and only water poured out. This is flood-time, and the purification of your conquering shall consume all.
One Russian doll inside of another. The children in their masks stand around laughing at you. The wheels of the jeep spin endlessly: small stones cast through the void.
Flying saucers. Secret knowledge forgotten. The possibility of pushing through. Handfuls of dust. The sand and the egg-timer. A crystal maze.
Ancient memory buried deep. The rock edifice blocking the way.
Every angle delineated. A door locked from the inside. The answer is yes.
A trap, a trick; the cave of mind. The answer is no.
Lights blink on the dashboard. The three dots of the hunter’s belt. Seven sisters.
Some gather to wave farewell. The river is calm and blacker than onyx.
In the dream, motion is standing still. The soul enclosed, in the vehicle of the body. Transformation breaking the membrane.
All things, within us. God waiting outside the universe, allowing atoms to settle. In love, destruction.
These feet, for always, on the ground.

CIRCLE - A mythsterious holographic mirage-collage

A couple of short interconnected pieces, now, that can either be read together, apart, in either order, or just rearrange the lines as you see fit to create your own user-friendly version. Though now I think about it, that might not be too bad an idea... Anyway - this is the first bit. It's sort of a story, sort of a poem, sort of a mythsterious holographic mirage-collage... decide for yourself.

CIRCLE

These hands on the steering wheel. Rictus grip on unyielding leather.

You’ve been down here for some time now. No trawlermen, milkmaids or merfolk responding to cries. Oxygen bubbles pushing against the lifelessness of life.

It is said bells might sound; some portal to another world. Seaweed drifts past; the silver flash of piscine intrigue for a second; one glimpse, then gone.

Only the dead have been watching you this week. Behind the monitor, a tapping glow. Somedays you wondered if those conspiracy theorists were right and you yourself were becoming robotized, brainwashed; melded to your screen and sucked down; nullified by ELFs and the CIA.

Further now. The engine lifeless, gurgling of air escaping the hidden corners.

Feathers found in unexpected places; signifying intervention: explaining nothing. That which is hidden is found again.

Only the firstborn stand on the edge of this bridge. Only the last of the line will jump. Wedding belles.

Through blackest glimmer of ocean’s gloom, those who jump this night seek to reshuffle the night sky. A stopwatch reset and flipped upside down. Stars spinning back to the start. Begin the human race again, only this time, do not cheat.

Out of pools, amoeba. and then dinosaurs. You forget what came next. An ouroboros of answers. The line has ended.

The second of silence before the hit; before the subterranean impacts with the still-breathing species and swallows it down forever.

Only a dream. Only reality. A hand clawing at a window, waiting to be let out.

We are swimming with the dead this week. Waiting to be born again.

TRAINSONG - A short story

Another short story then. This one's not quite as weird as the other ones. But it's still weird. It also won a prize! Ken Macleod (proper actual SF writer) thought it was 'perfectly decent' if I recall his wording. Damning with faint praise and all that... Like some of the events of the tale, this one may still be 'in transit.' It was written to a wordcount and perhaps could benefit from either an extension or a pruning... you decide.

TRAINSONG

Ariadne glanced irritated at her mobile. The time was 11:37 PM.
The night was pushing her down. Fucking hell. Ten minutes. Wasn’t supposed to be. Still time, though.
She hurried down the steps into the drear alcove of the station. The main forecourt was as cold as ever. The only people around were a faintly confused looking couple, weighed down by enormous backpacks. They were squinting up at the time-display screen with looks of mild confusion on their faces. As Ari looked over at them their countenances took on a sheen of crestfallen disappointment. She heard raised voices; probably Polish, but God all those Eastern European accents sounded the same. She wasn’t clever enough to say for sure. She had always been one for picking up on other peoples’ emotions; although this wasn’t something which normally did Ari any favours. She usually tried to avoid it.
Like that girl at work. The unspellable name. Ari hadn’t had any idea what she had been talking about, in English or Polish, so everyone had ignored her. This had made Ari cry one night. It had been so very frustrating.
Said it was about the rent. Gave him the fucking rent. That wasn’t the fucking issue.
They’re lost, she thought with a mild upset that flitted in and out of her heart in a few passing seconds; pushed aside by other concerns. Go and tell them but come on. Ten minutes.
The possibly Polish people turned and started to head for the ticket barriers. Ari strode in the same direction, fumbling in her pocket for a ticket; hoping one was there.

The carriage was empty and all the lights were out. This seemed a little weird to Ari; at this time of night, things were always activated and there was usually at least a handful of people besides herself. Just last week the conductor had had that business with the drunk woman who had been shouting incoherent insults: Ari had been at the other end of the carriage. Thank fuck. You really don’t want to be dealing with lunatics.
He’s at home though
She picked a window seat facing a table and slumped down. This bit always filled Ari with a warm sense of relief that she had made it - even though it had been six years of this bloody commuting and she had never been late or missed her train. Was this why she had that recurring dream about running into the station to realise her train had left hours ago?
Perhaps. Self-psychology was not her strong suit.
His though. Clever clever.
After a few moments the carriage shuddered. The lights flashed on and the route display on the roof began rolling LED messages. There was life after all.
More minutes passed. Nobody else came into the carriage.
Ari looked idly around her, seeing an abandoned coffee cup and sandwich carton on the opposite aisle. People coming and going.
The train finally started up. Ari went to search around for her iPod but sure that it was lost in the cavernous depths of her bag, gave up with a half-arsed pfth of exasperation. Divorced from the usual white noise of commuter chatter, the somnambulant rumbling of the train bordered on soothing.
Might get to sleep.
Outside of the window, distant yellow lights began to careen past her. Flying by so fast.
More moments passed. Ari’s head began to nod.
No sleep tonight. He’ll be on about it. Why don’t you like it when I talk to you?
Would you rather
rant rant. stop listening after the fourth philosophical
do you want me to touch you i mean as if fucking hell
The train shuddered to a stop. Ari’s head jerked back up.
She was aware of a voice speaking quietly behind her. A low mumble.
Someone else’s come through. Doesn’t matter.
Look at the time he keeps saying. Why do you have to stay out all night
Jason’s gorgeous though. He so would
Actually meant it. Five years. Five years just gone snap like that gone
There was no point in trying to hold it off. Ari felt the floodgates pending.
Not here. Someone in the carriage. Ticketman’ll come, I’ll look a fucking mess. Look a mess anyway
A few tears hit her lap. The weight began pushing up.
The throat was always the first to go. Had anyone been sat in front of Ari, they would have seen her composure going; the shoulders already starting to tremble.
why am I so angry all the time
why won’t he just do it I’ve had enough too much
‘Of course,’ the voice in the seat behind her said, louder and clear now, ‘this is a side-effect. We are but side effects of one another.’
Ari swallowed hard and closed her eyes. This’ll go this’ll stop, she thought. Not this time. Not the knife tonight. Know it's wrong
‘An education forged in pain. Such things can be bypassed. But never overlooked.’
Ari opened her eyes. A shock hit her; forcing the blackened feelings clean out of her mind.
The owner of the voice had moved. He now sat in front of her on the other side of the table.
‘We have seven minutes,’ he said to her, as Ari struggled to take in his bizarre appearance, ‘to save the world from who you are. This is nearly the Madonna song, no?’
The man’s accent was almost the same as that girl at work; but surely not. He was tall; slim yet muscular: shaped like a dancer, and inexplicably dressed in what appeared to be an extremely close-fitting one piece outfit, the surface of which was a dull, unreflective silver.
His features were aquiline; angular. His white hair was close-cut. His mouth twitched the tiniest hint of a smile at her: as if he had never smiled before and was trying to figure out how to start. The stranger’s eyes glinted: something that stuck Ari as placing him somewhere between sinister menace and unending compassion.
Stuntman, Ari thought, her brain battling to hold onto something concrete and explanatory: circus
‘Agnieszka,’ the silver man said. ‘There is such a thin line between love and hate. My name is also different, so I will not tell of it.’
Ari felt her stomach sinking and then turning over. She suddenly needed the toilet.
Details. Saskia thought she got raped. Changed her mind. Remember. Face. Databases
‘What’s your name?’ Ari said in a very small voice; poorly-researched defence strategies scattering through her mind.
‘You could call me anything,’ the silver man said. ‘What I am does not come into play here. But the name is key. Yours come from a variety of sources. Very holy: utterly pure. These are expressions you could read. A weaver; Queen of snakes: Mistress of the spider. Through powers of your own you helped him escape from the labyrinth. These things in legends. We are what our names make us. We become them, and they become us. Agents of change.’
The man held out his arm and spread his palm. The ambient lights of the train seemed to dim slightly.
‘All can change but some must first acknowledge. Here.’
In the air above the man’s outstretched hand a blue globe of light about the size of a football formed. Ari found herself gazing into its fluttering texture, wondering why the object’s apparent brightness was not dazzling her; but instead drawing her in.
‘The book of lies,’ the man said. ‘Now look inside.’
And then Ari was flying again. Continents moved beneath her.
She had arrived inside a room. No, not a room - this was too large to be a room.
Before anything else, Ari noticed the thin, rubbery cable that seemed to extend from somewhere around her midriff. Although still fully clothed, Ari got the overwhelming sense that this was her umbilical cord.
A sudden hot flash of panic hit her. She was floating; hanging suspended inside a wide vertical tunnel that extended upwards for a seeming infinitude of miles. It was coolly lit from on high by the distantly bright lights of some far-off surface Ari was sure she would never glimpse in the dim lights of this lifetime. All around her and as far as she could see on the inside surface of the strange edifice were small doors about the size of car doors.
Ari couldn’t see where the ground was. The umbilicus stretched off into nowhere. She felt further panic welling.
Please do not be alarmed, the now-familiar voice echoed in her head: The connective tissue. A thread that binds worlds.
Ari drifted close to the nearest circular door. It appeared to be made out of burnished wood and was pitted and marked in some places; as if worn down over ages.
On the door was a small piece of paper. It appeared to have been affixed with sticky tape. On it was written her name.
She checked the door next to it. This also held her name.
The machine and the mechanism. The nucleus in the cytoplasm.
The door on the other side featured messages in a further indecipherable language. Had she been properly asleep, Ari would have instantly recognized one as Jewish Middle Babylonian Aramaic; the other door marked out in post-flood Pangaean Atlantean would also have been clear. At least; clearer than most things.


We are entering the protoplasmic shift, the shining man said, as Ari hung suspended in time. Certain decisions have been made and others remain. Your future is a cloud. Continents still drift outward; one day they will all meet again. The world is a bubble. Will it be this door or the next?
Ari thought then of Riz. Manners maketh a man. Sweetness and light.
And the other hand; Jase - Companion of the dark. Reliably unreliable. Summed up in one word.
He was something. Without him, the knife. With him, the union of souls.
Ari opened the first door. Inside was a small cupboard area. In its centre was a ring made of paper. Ari reached out and touched it.
She fell back inestimable miles. The gulf between cold stars swallowed her like a friend: while the sullen shiny blacks and incomparable colours of infinite lives lived so far away and yet closer than knowledge said hello, then goodbye again, for ever.

Ari heard the tinny beep of the old watch which always lay for security purposes in the bottom of her bag. Pulled back to relative normalcy and oddly compelled to look for it, Ari reached in and raked around.
Her hand alighted on something unfamiliar. Something round. She pulled it out.
‘This is Agnieszka’s wedding ring. A name so often forgotten.’
Ari realised her mouth was hanging open but did little to rectify the situation other than move her lips and tongue to form words.
‘She told me… she’d lost it. At reception. I… wasn’t really listening…’
‘It is not real gold. But imbued with all that is needed. Return it to her.
this will give you something to talk about. Perhaps for weeks.’
The man stood up; his mouth finally resolving itself into a smile. ‘Look at the time. Morning. Another world beginning without compunction. This is the trainsong; on and on. Getting off but always back on again. Arriving unleashed to begin again.’
A final though drifted into Ari’s head as she roused herself and headed for the door.
All of this is over now.
Never having faltered in its journey, the train came to a halt. Ari pressed the button and the door opened.
For the first time in what felt like a very long while, Ariadne Somerville knew exactly where she was headed. For once, this was quite enough.

DAYS OF CONJURATION - A short story


And now, another properly finished story. Although it's debatable as to whether you can actually call this one a story. Who cares though, it won a short story competition so it must be!

DAYS OF CONJURATION

The club is closing. The club closed hours ago. The club is just opening.

Walking back from the club. Another cold morning. Most of them are cold.
One day is dead now. As it passes, another springs gasping into life.
The crossing point is 12:33. This is sometimes the time but not always.

This is Sunderland, in the last century. You are out of place now. By the river, under the bridge; but you will be alright. The sailors are watching over you.
Here on the campus walkway, abnormally-sized nuts and bolts regard you with an artisan’s dismissal. They were here before you. Who are you to judge them, to even try and comprehend the thoughts and feelings of the people who created them, their uncanny forms hewn out of human struggle, out of hope, out of love?
Next to the nuts and bolts, a twisting abstract sculpture of monuments long since gone bends itself into the sky and remembers all that was.

You have no idea what happened here.

Far from the riverside, the city’s unremarkable lights paint cryptic yet comforting messages; reaching across to embrace. Here we are, they say; here we were and here we will be again.

She’s standing next to you and she’s talking about that boyfriend, the one from Scotland. The one who had to go away.
And it looked like it was going to happen for a very long time. You never know what’s going to happen, she says, brightening against the funereal weather with the lightest of smiles. You really do never know. Everything could change and you could be left standing with nothing.
The statue on the walkway of sailors and ships and industry collapsed and moved away just sits and reaches. This night, it has nothing to say.

Me and me nan, another girl says, somewhere else. My nan died and we were really close. She’s leaning in close since the music is so loud, and you feel time slipping away: a subtle loss of the self, annihilated by the music, folded out of existence by the stains in the carpet. There is writing on the table. The words say; get out now.

Disappearing like temporary internet files. This folder is empty. This file has either been moved or deleted. We’re sorry it didn’t work out.

A Blue screen event. Shut down like a kick in the teeth. The year is 1997.
That man could take over the world. That man could take the world down.
The hungry caterpillar drank all the oil in the soil. We stand now, symbolic in your hyperbolic shadow. We are free at last but we do not know it; having been swept away in tides of false rhetoric and duplicitous doubletalk.

I start wars yet break hearts. Who am I?

York. The pamphlet directs you to the statue of Mars, the Roman God of War. He stands untouched by spectacle next to some plaques and a content museum guard with a laminated badge.
Mars is not in the mood for conversation this morning; he has grown tired of advertising the fashions of lost art and chocolate bars. He remembers a time when destruction was the norm. He’s just mad because someone bashed his nose off aeons ago, and now he’s lost face. No pun intended.
Those were simpler days, of course. March was the colour red. Now it’s just a month like any other; except when people are born, and die.
They still fight in March. Just like any other.

Of all the deities, many of these faces have stared at you across the years. Some of them were loving, some condemning; but when night finally came to protect you, most of them became vast and moon-like and faraway and could not help you anymore.
Some were left alone. When in a room surrounded by others, the food contained more obvious flavours; hints of recipes concocted to forge understandings between those who could not speak. The lady and the tramp.

If we stand at the crossroads and the devil asks us who has the best tunes, what is our answer?

The year is 2002. This morning she wears your name even if she has been sleeping with someone else. Her eyes speak truth but her body lies.
The dishes just keep coming. They have little or no concern for human thought or feeling. They know that one day they will not be here.
Sarah brings you a drink. She is from south Africa and is beautiful, kind and perfect. In two months you will no longer know her. She will be in London and gone.
Dana is from new Zealand. She is broken and suicidal. She is also perfect, but no one notices here.

No one comes here. Here is the end of the world. Things falling apart, then pulled back together again. Bodies shifted into planetary conjunctions by aloof high-born entities who learned so much about themselves that they were forced to admit that they didn’t even exist anyway, and so could not ever possibly be held responsible for these actions. It was someone else wot dun it, guv.


A house on the top of a hill. The ashtrays are filled to overfilling and someone has fallen on the floor again. Inside, the premature burial becomes premature rebirth.

The tale of the reoccurring dream of the school room that can never be found is told here;
The corridors are after hours. Most of the lights are out. You walk, you search; running into unfamiliar turns that stab your heart with remembrances of opportunity leased to the gods of invisible education.
You turn a corner. There is a door left open. Inside, the classroom is just as you remember it. But not.
And still she is there. The only one. Still younger than you, just. Still silent, gazing down at a desk. The hair a little darker than usual; that acne you recall that did clear up. Still there.

A million internet searches and nothing found. Whose jumped-up idea of a good idea was that?

On the path facing the loch two people sit shivering and watching the water as it flirts with motion. Sometimes they see the mountains.
Somewhere out there in the labyrinthine darkness that shrouds their nebulous and arcane presence, there are goblins; the cold-troll-hearted denizens of the places beneath where you once were. The kobolds who scurry about their closeted ways: down in the pixy mines; in the monotonous places no human eyes have ever been opened enough to see.
Across the stillest night they say to you; listen. You can’t hear anything.
The person beside you says, Oh my god, that’s terrible. do you want my coat?

Seagulls gather over playgrounds. Mould-inviting bread is thrown onto garage roofs and the birds redesign their plans, without recourse to human communication or consultation; yet still giving in to co-dependence.
Somehow both still find sustenance. Human civilizations always grow out of water-rich settlements. But bread helps too.

Flashpoints and little eclipses. That drunk Spaniard spends the night on the couch in the worn hotel lounge. The porter waits, mildly anxious and utterly awake.
The time is now 4:18. We need charge him nothing: since, at this time of night, no price is placed on solace.

Cologne. A cathedral haunted by the ghosts of everyone that left their fears and insecurities locked up in the gargoyles for safe keeping. Somewhere someone drunkenly barges their way into the wrong toilet; half-singing, half declaring, we could be heroes; not the German version.

Decisions are things to be made, ignored or sometimes ran away from. But at the end of them, there will always be progress.
The last man on earth. I disappear but can never be found. What am I?

Many centuries have come and said goodbye. When the others come to visit this planet, peeking their multifaceted compound eyes through masses of overgrowing vegetation, startling the animals who had for so long been untroubled by the presence of any intelligence higher than themselves, they might perhaps uncover just the faintest broken remnants of something white and ancient poking its nature-scoured hand out of the Earth. The aliens have no means of discerning the year and so cannot even begin to date the artifact; they have no such words as nature, broken or white. Months and calendars are also foreign to them; yet despite this, they love numbers.

Visiting times are communicated by the orderly. There is noise on the phone; perhaps it is a clipboard being adjusted: or someone passing.
You just need to do something with your life, the man says, searching the cabinet beside his bed for one of the soft drinks everyone has brought him. Be your own man.
Someone dying has died here long ago. The cleaners have been and gone.

This table is tan, smooth and completely unmarked. She holds my hand carefully, running one finger up and down the inside of my palm. A life in miniature.
The swirl and the coffee stirred. If there is coffee then after all the tears are done, everything will always be okay. Raindrops and thunder.

Just drifting off to sleep. A green glow from the nightlight protecting the dark from itself.
I am incomplete yet was finished centuries ago. What am I?

A park morning. The dog runs by the tower blocks that stand watching the horizon like pensive parents; acting as custodians of the light and dark, their dirt-encrusted offspring soon to be loosed again into the day to do whatever they wish with their lives; sometimes die, sometimes live - but always survive.
The dog doesn’t notice. It is chasing an idle woodpigeon. The woodpigeon escapes.

And in some stories, there is walking on the surface of the moon. Except in those stories seen in numinous dreamtime, it never seems all that much like the moon but more like a foreign country. And that is the past; a place we can never visit again. You only need to go there once. A landfill with nothing in it.

Spiderwebs draped from leaf to leaf in the early December chill. Ladybirds later, traversing cautiously, knowing that one day soon they will all be nearly extinct.
A tiny book store emptied of books and ready to be filled with new ones. Another morning wreathed in fog that seeks to hide creation from itself. A werewolf or a phantom.
Lives disappearing, but not yours. Not yours.

Canadian snowdrifts. Kids running on and on forever, knowing that one day, they might be free to cast off those mittens and never need to go back home ever again.
I could be here, yet am there and everywhere. Where am I?

The front cover of the comic book is missing. All stories of revenge becoming the same if you squint at them in the right light; just stories of forgetting, remembering, hitting back, then accepting the Greek myths, the word of the Bible. The sound of someone else’s voice at four minutes past three in the morning in a pitch dark room in a small terraced house in the middle of the wilderness of nowhere that is the UK, in 1985.

Planes go overhead. The moving and the stationary. The wood by the sides of the train-track just begs to be collected. Not far off is the same-so-called wood the branches came from; but there is a darkness at the heart of that wood; the feeling that there is every chance that the wood may become a forest, and that the forest might become a path: just an endless road in the murk of brown-green, leading to nothing, and something: and nowhere. Although sometimes, if not always, there is a something behind a nothing.
The eye of the needle. The way of the warrior.
Who knows what the magician has hidden behind the curtain?

Across the void of possible occurrences I bleed in the National grid. Hydroelectric stations pulse my messages out to workplaces. The ebb and flow of yellow coloured lines moves hither and thither.
Acceleration seen from the stratosphere. Fifty billion points of light become snakes; rushing, slithering, multiplying: subdividing.
Satellite masts and frost on the morning quiet. Spacemen at home in space, looking down.


A tiny kitten is released for the first time from the safe, defined corners of its first home into the tearing noise and borderless nightmare of the savage outside. With this disaster of understanding comes knowledge; of sorts.

A becoming of gold is forecast. The way of all things unfolding. Like shooting fish in a barrel, in the dark. A name unknown.

A gnosis that was here is now everywhere. The lady went into the cabinet yet somehow she is now not there.
I shall now saw myself in half. You never know what’s going to happen.

Days of conjuration will be left behind. The imagining is all that remains. The past; the future. The inbetweens.

THE CRACKS - A short story


Here, then, is a little short story from a couple of years back. I won't ramble on here, I'll just post the thing. As far as I can tell this is actually finished now, if anything's a work in progress I shall let you know.

THE CRACKS

It was on the day before the small people came that Wife decided she had finally had enough of Husband and his philandering ways.

A sort of realisation had been coming to her for quite some time now. In hindsight, and in many ways, it had been the coming of the small people that had helped Wife understand that had she been becoming enormously complacent for quite some time now.

Over the past six months or so, Wife had been experiencing the distinctly troubling sensation of feeling her senses getting subtly worn down; and her emotions becoming dulled to the point where, when He left his clothes scattered on the bedroom floor so that she could not tell what was clean and what was not, Wife wasn’t capable of feeling a whole lot of anything that would result in a gnashed teeth, pulled hair, tantrum or a raising of voices. Or an anything of any kind.

But then; there had been the Small People. Of course.

The Small People had initially been slow in announcing their presence. It was only on that first occasion - when Wife returned home from work early on a Thursday afternoon due to the drama of a health and safety inspection - that she discovered the floors of the bedroom; and their new state of immaculate cleanliness.

What made this state of affairs even more unnerving for Wife were those extra details. There was seeing that exact spot where Husband had kicked her glass of red wine over that last Christmas when he had gone running for the phone - and that other patch, where Siamese terror Pogo had peed because she was in a bad mood with Husband ignoring her all the time. Examining the length of the carpet, wondering if she had perhaps misjudged the stains’ original locations, Wife discovered there was now no trace of either spillage and only the puffy newness of clean white carpet. A surface that, despite being only six months old, had recently started to show evidence of being worn and trampled down, and of having become soiled in certain places; a little like Wife.

Except that now all of these worn places were immaculate; as if some mysteriously charitable carpet-fitting men had surreptitiously been round while Wife had been out, and laid an entirely new pile free of charge: as if to please her with some kind of pre-planned event-style present.

Except in her heart Wife knew it had not been any carpet-fitting men who had initiated the change.

These had been different men; characters more unseen and amorphous. Wife had thought about them that night as she had lain in an otherwise empty bed, eyes fixed on the long crack that ran the near-length of the skirting board that nearly joined the wall to the ground. She tried to see into the split; wondering if there was perhaps something behind it.

But it was a thin line: not even a breeze came through it. Nothing could be there. Except sometimes at night, during the long hours when even Husband slept without snoring, Wife would hear the noises. For many a month Wife had succeeded in convincing herself that these were merely the scrapings of errant mice or vagabond squirrels, playing their arcane games in the loft and in the walls - or even perhaps Owls.

Charity at work had spoken of Owls. She had found a family of Tawnys nesting in the hollows of her garage a few years back and had been too scared to disturb the intimacy of the animals’ lair, lest she frightened them off - fearing that, if she were to disrupt the sanctity of their repose, Charity would effectively soil the creatures’ habitat by the very dint of her presence and drive them away to some cold location where they would struggle, wither and perish.

Some secrets were better left uncovered. Charity was a timid sort, and wasn’t one to generate dispute or enmity of any kind. This was a quality Wife most admired in her workmate, and was secretly jealous of: being so utterly incapable of it herself; or at least, not for any extended periods of time.

And Wife felt such a period was approaching its endtime. As she peacefully seethed in the dark, sensing the angry voices rustling at the back of her head like crunched sweet wrappers, the warmth of the unrevealed night pushed down on her.

Beside her and at this time, Husband was long gone. Wife was inevitably still awake: with all of it to deal.

There were such things as auditory hallucinations, Wife knew - Wife had experienced such a thing once. A terrifying phantasmagoria, she had thought it was, although that was of course an outmoded term; nowadays it was more likely classifiable as something more like hypnagogia, or hypnopompia; Wife had got the two mixed up upon researching but suspected from the thoroughness of her readings that the two definitions were essentially different words for the same thing.

The occurrence had taken place the night of the carpet-cleaning. It had been much later on, in the long hours: the times that Wife both anticipated and sometimes dreaded but not for any specific reason. Husband had been faraway and comatose on the other side and Wife had been lost, in some remote fantasy about a famous actor and an exotic location. The confabulation had been idle and underdeveloped, not seeming to evolve to any significant degree, and it was just as nothing much at all was happening in her dreamitude, Wife’s entire body froze stock still and the sounds began.

Wife had of course found explanations. Her later studying of the reasons for and symptoms of sleep paralysis, or Old Hag syndrome as it was often called, had not yet taken root in her consciousness, so instead of cool acknowledgement of the scenario, Wife was instead gripped by the most visceral and chilling sensation of dread she had ever felt in her entire life - worse even than those delirious few seconds three years back when she had been abroad; where she had gone back home with a charming but anonymous Gentleman she had met by shadow in Mykonos. Under florid moonlight, the Gentleman he had pulled a knife and held it to her throat; demanding improbable remunerations in a tongue Wife could have sworn was Greek but easily could have been any number of languages; or any number of languages spoken at once. The Gentleman had held her in this lovers’ tranquillity for some moments before releasing her, and had laughed before running off into the night; and it had been then that Wife had found herself flooded with the most impossible rush of endorphins and had become giddy with supernatural delight.

The fear had not lasted then. Wife had once again not asked for it, but the sensation had returned all the same.

It had come flooding back. And with it, walking steadily in tiny footfalls Wife could not hear but knew were occurring in a steady, metronomic rhythm, the Small People had returned; as they had always been returning.

The pulling away of the duvet was the first indication that this time, they really did mean business.

There had of course been that other time, Wife reminded herself as the duvet slid ominously away and she remained paralyzed; two months back, when Husband had gone out to a swingers’ bar and not returned until the morning. Wife had not done the dishes in a fit of pique - and it had been the on that morning that Wife discovered every pot and pan gleaming clean and stacked accordingly back in their respective houses, and even the oven thoroughly degreased - as if worked over by attentive yet elusive hands.

Of course, Wife must have imagined the kitchen was in a worse state than it was. Of course These little vacancies of mind were to be expected.

And that other time, one month back, Wife thought; as the barely perceptible stretching of the mattress under her back indicated the little boots marching onto it, having made their way up from their previous location on the floor. The time none of the bins had been taken out, gathering as they were in the hallway, awaiting the vagaries of some unidentified council official managing to sort out some kind of appropriate collection facility for the street. And just at the point where Husband’s inability to keep old food from spilling onto the floor in disgusting puddles expired, and Wife’s patience was similarly on its final warning, Wife had again returned from Anonymous Work to find the hallway clear and stripped of landlord-upsetting fire hazards. Relief had hit her then; albeit a relief tinged with a more watery sense of unease.

Wife had worried at many times during the long hours that, perhaps, one day, she would just turn out to be one of the people who just slipped through the cracks. Maybe she had thought about it for so long, someone had picked up on one of her unanswered desires and finally responded in kind. But, since Wife never let any of her deepest wishes out into the light - knowing that if they did get out they could perhaps damage someone or something - surely this was highly unlikely. So, like gentle Charity and her itinerant but untroubled Owl family, Wife kept these thoughts to herself.

Perhaps they would not trouble her any more.

The mattress creaked. With a faint and muffled shuffling, Wife felt Husband sliding away; carefully pulled by industrious individuals.

Perhaps Husband would not trouble her any more. Feeling the paralysis beginning to lose its hold on her, Wife relaxed and began to drift into a deep and peaceful sleep; untroubled by dreams of relentless Husband, or of unclean residences; but merely of quiet and noble Owls, going about their business in the closeted night; silently preying on animals that were dumber and slower than they.

They flew glassily through the dark, their wings beating to a strong and unknown rhythm: a rhythm Wife did not recognize but felt it resonating with her very being; lulling her into alpha waves of luxurious torpor.

When morning came, Wife awoke to a spotless environs and the honeyed sunlight of another new day.

She also found to her looming relief that she was no longer a Wife.
Her ring had gone. The bed was clear and free of any clutter. It would be so easy now to spread the sheets.

UnWife smiled to herself. Perhaps she would fetch herself some breakfast.
As she roused herself, just by chance she glanced down at the skirting board; and at the place where its scuffed surface met the carpet.

There was no longer any gap there. The shadowy crease had ceased to exist. Letting slip a flighty, birdlike chuckle, UnWife imagined it must never have been any kind of a crack in the first place.

She went downstairs and headed for the bathroom; all set to shower herself clean in preparation for the rigours of a new day.

It was only upon pausing to assess the severe split that ran the length of the floor in front of the shower cubicle that UnWife thought to herself - for a blank, black moment - that she might perhaps not be entirely free of troubles after all.

A clunking noise sounded beneath her feet. UnWife became distressed.
Swiftly departing the bathroom and closing the door after her, UnWife left the bathroom untended.

Someone else would have to go. The people below would only wait so long.

Making a list of Friends in her head, UnWife began to ready herself for work.

Perhaps Charity would be able to help. No one would even notice me if I wasn’t here, she would joke. Charity was, after all, the very model of her name.

Wife who was no longer Wife but in fact was now possibly someone else entirely went to fetch herself something from the kitchen. She thought there were perhaps still pancakes. Finally, there would be peace to eat.

APOLOGIE - Intro Pt. 2

Or, something like a proper first post which regrettably goes a bit awry at some point before the end

Okay. Now I've got that out of my system...

The basic idea here is that I'll be posting a variety of stuff. Stories, articles, bits of my novels, works in progress, pictures... there may also be general other observations, more standard diary-style blog bits... at the moment I haven't decided exactly what direction the blog is going to take which I think has surely got to be a good thing. So do prepare yourself for wild and inconsistent swings in tone and content. Please feel free to post lengthy objectionable diatribes about how much you hate me as a consequence. I bloody love that.

As I have a small amount of time available over the next month or so, I'm probably going to be writing a new novel, more or less from scratch (don't worry, I have actually thought about it a bit already) so some of that may materialize as we go along along. In the meantime, the next few posts will be short stories what I have actually completed. Relax, there's not all that many of them.

Although of course if you've actually read this far back, you are clearly identifiable as a shiny-suited child of the future, living in the year 2121, riding about in a hovercar and knocking back space-pills while grooving to intergalactic jazz, and by now are fully aware of my long and tumultous writing legacy. Ever since I was accidentally eaten by that rogue cybershark while performing a very long and pretentious ode to inter-species intercourse at the Venusian olympics of last year, my work has been spoken about in awed and hushed tones.

And now, YOU have scrolled this far back, via the intertextual word-web-port slotted firmly into the wronger hemisphere of your brain, and found the very first entries, from that long-ago year of 2011, when all of the same stuff that always happens in every year of human history was happening all over again, and everyone was too overcome with nostalgia about the last time it all happened to even notice it all happening again!

So. Enjoy, drink it all down, you have reached the beginning of everything. There is nothing left. You must feel spent now.

So. light up a cigarette. Seeing as how smoking is not a concept you've even heard of in the year 2121, you can if you wish set fire to a rolled-up sheet of paper and hold it to your lips while reclining, in an unconvincing attempt to look louche and satisfied. I hope that all-in-one Tron-style bodysuit you're wearing isn't flammable, or else you're really going to regret travelling all this way back in time just to read a blog in a moment or two, when your jumpsuit catches on fire and is totally ruined. Then you're, like, just totally going to have to wear a cardigan. Or something.

Hang on though. This hypothetical reader hasn't ACTUALLY physically travelled back through time, though, have they? That was just a comedic conceit. Cos if we hadn't used said comedic conceit of someone from the future reading this blog, then we probably wouldn't have written all that last bit. And then we could have just skipped this whole post and got on with the business of actually posting something that wasn't just knocked off in ten minutes. And not talked about ourselves in the majestic plural. Cos that is properly the first sign of losing it. I am SO not like the Queen.

Okay. That was a fairly ridiculous post, I know. Don't worry, there probably will be ones in the future that resemble it. The only difference is, these ones will have incandescently brilliant writing attached to them!*

Now. Get your rocket packs on and LET'S GO!

* And probably more ridiculousness. But at least you'll feel satisfied.**

** nb satisfaction via this blog is not actually guaranteed at any point of proceedings. Either now or in the year 2121. Or at any point in-between. Who do you think I am, Mick Jagger???

GET A LOAD OF IT - aka The Intro

or insert your own deeply profound and multilayered statement of intent here

Yes, yes, y'all, here it is, exploding through a messy afterbirth of bloody and severed limbs, pouring down your street like the abandoned childhood you thought you could deny forever but now you can't, getting all up in your grill and poking you in your mindhole until your very equilibrium can't handle it and blows like a geyser, drenching the world in gore...

Yes, it's my blog. Welcome all. If you don't like it, go away and don't ever, EVER, look at me that way again. I already feel as if you've violated me in some untold way that has yet to be described in great detail on Blogger, or anywhere. And I won't, cos even I can't handle the idea of repeating those things you said to me. How dare you. I'll never look at a toothbrush the same way again. Or a hammock.

Here I'll mainly be posting stuff what I have wrote with my mind, mainly involving these little things you might have heard of called words. Most of these will probably be part of something I like to call the English language, although seeing as how it's an inevitable likelihood that I will at some point run out of those (there aren't all that many words when you add them up, I think the total number is something like 54 and a half), I shall then switch to my automatic backup default of pre-flood Pangean Atlantean glyph-code. There's plenty of them, plus they glow in the dark unlike the words of English, which to be frank, look positively pedestrian by comparison.

It costs a right bomb shelling out for a Windows-compatible keyboard that has those babies on it, lemme tell ya - strangely there's not all that much demand for keyboards retro-fitted to the language of an extinct civilization that may not even have existed. Guess I'm just ahead of the curve.

Right. That's enough of that. BRING ON THE WRITINGZ!!!